In celebration of 9-11

We all know that 9-11 is not really "Patriot Day".  It's "Call Everyone A Terrorist Day".  And indeed, there are many people who should be called terrorists out and about this year.  Let's take a look at the past day or so and see what pops up:

Are Fire Hydrants in Your Neighborhood Turned On?

If so, you might be helping terrorists.  In this Texas district the council was smart enough to turn off all fire hydrants since 9-11!

"These hydrants need to be cut off in a way to prevent vandalism or any kind of terrorist activity, including something in the water lines," Hodges said.

Sure, it cost one local man his home in a fire, but you know what?  At least the terrorists didn't get his stuff.

Lose your house, lose your vote

The chairman of the Republican Party in Macomb County Michigan, a key swing county in a key swing state, is planning to use a list of foreclosed homes to block people from voting in the upcoming election as part of the state GOP’s effort to challenge some voters on Election Day.

Sure, it stops fakers from voting from foreclosed addresses.  But what about people who still live there?  What about people who don't have a new address?  What about people fighting and contesting the foreclosure?  Don't worry, this would stop them from voting too.  Remember, when poor people vote rich people suffer.

 

Senate Committee Expands Justice Department Copyright Enforcement Powers

Sweeping legislation granting the U.S. Justice Department the ability to prosecute civil cases of copyright infringement sailed through the Senate Judiciary Committee 14-4 on Thursday, and is expected to hit the Senate floor for a vote soon.
[...]
The Enforcement of Intellectual Property Rights Act, (.pdf) as we reported Tuesday, also creates a Cabinet-level copyright-patent czar charged with creating a worldwide plan to combat piracy. The czar would "report directly to the president and Congress regarding domestic and international intellectual property enforcement programs."

Finally, people are stepping up to change unreasonable search and seizure, along with due process, into the new standard.  I'm sick of all these "rights" and whatnot.  It takes to long to get people prosecuted!

Quebec man changes name to dodge relentless airport screening

While he loses patriot points for both complaining about security and for being Canadian he does get ingenuity points.  He got around the terrorist watch list by changing his name from Mario Labbé to François Mario Labbé.  Really.  It's not like a terrorist would ever think of chaning their name.  The system is safe for another day.

Cops Need Warrant for Cellphone Location Data, Judge Rules
And this man is a terrorist.  He pushed until a judge ruled that the police do indeed need a warrant to tap your cell phone and track your movement.  But don't worry.  The ruling only applies to Pennsylvania so the rest of the country is still fare game.  Freedom is knowing that people with guns always know where you are.  Always.