Call for help: RE Ubuntu and Linux

Recently I've been working on a bunch of tech projects.  I have a Media Center PC at 98% completion and 14 inch, wifi enabled digital picture frame assembled and just waiting for an actual frame.  I also picked up a discarded laptop and put Linux Ubuntu on to mess around with.  I figured a new OS would be fun to learn and being a techy guy it wouldn't be much trouble.

 

Well, 3 days with this thing and it's driving me nuts.  The install was a pain, but that's because the laptop's optical drive is a bit... touch.  I ended up rolling a distro onto a USB key and telling the BIOS to ask where to boot from with every start up.  That worked and now it boots great.  But Ubuntu isn't playing nice with me.

 

I figure the best way to start learning is to jump right in and what better way to learn basic system settings than by customizing the interface.  I figured changing the screensaver, wallpaper, icons, etc would be a great way to learn the menus and see what sort of look Ubuntu can give me.  Well, it's been 3 days and I have yet to figure out how to install a simple screensaver.  Maybe I haven't found the right forum sites but no set of instructions has worked so far.  I'm not a Microsoft whore but in windows you either ran an install file or dropped the .scr file into  your windows directory.  Easy.  No so with this.  One screensaver has a filetype that doesn't launch any sort of installer or manager and the other I downloaded is a compressed archive with many many subfolders.  Extracting those to my system didn't do anything at all.

 

Then there's the desktop manager.  There's a program called Compiz.  It lets you customize your desktop with great visual effects.  You can make windows jiggle, you can customize the layout of multiple desktops and you can filter colours.  Supposedly.  I have seen many many many references to this really neat looking cube display for managing multiple desktops.  You hit a key and a 3D cube appears with a different desktop on each side.  Just rotate it and the one you want spins over and pops up.  Doesn't work.  All it lets me do is flip between 2, making the rest of my desktops (I use a total of 4) completely inaccessible.  Then there's the colour filtering.  You set the order of the filters, the hot key to activate/deactivate the filter and another hot key to cycle through them.  I've always wanted to make a steampunk set up with either a black and white or sepia screen.  This will be great!  Except that it never activates at all, let alone lets me cycle through.

 

The real kicker is that to get the few features that seem to work up and running I need to launch the program, Compiz, and then have it reload my window manager with ever log on.  Supposedly I've successfully made it run on startup except that it doesn't.  In Windows I would just make a shortcut to it in the startup folder or, if the programmer was smart, check a single box in the actual program to get it to run.  Well, I followed the instructions for a command line solution and a startup entry solution.  Neither does a single bit of good.

 

So, maybe some of you people out there can help me, or forward this on to a tech-savvy friend: How the hell does one do anything in Linux?  How is it that in one night I can rollout XP on an old laptop, customize it with software to make it an RSS fed picture frame, disassemble the whole of the hardware and put it back together to look like nothing but a screen.  I can do all that but in the course of 3 days I can't get a single feature that's supposedly the easy, welcoming staples of the of the Ubuntu system to run on a laptop with better specs?  I've been bookmarking sites and preparing for a Linux changeover for a couple of weeks but none of those sources have working instructions.  I mean, I know they must be working for most people because these are big web sites with satisfied comments.  But right after an out of the box install you would think that copying and pasting command line code would work.  I mean, there's no room for error there.  Any yet I get nothing.

 

So please, drop some advice or ask your friends to if they know about Linux, because I'm so close to just reformatting and putting windows back on.  At least that OS let me do things other than surf the internet.  Right now my cell phone has more user friendly appeal than my laptop.

In celebration of 9-11

We all know that 9-11 is not really "Patriot Day".  It's "Call Everyone A Terrorist Day".  And indeed, there are many people who should be called terrorists out and about this year.  Let's take a look at the past day or so and see what pops up:

Are Fire Hydrants in Your Neighborhood Turned On?

If so, you might be helping terrorists.  In this Texas district the council was smart enough to turn off all fire hydrants since 9-11!

"These hydrants need to be cut off in a way to prevent vandalism or any kind of terrorist activity, including something in the water lines," Hodges said.

Sure, it cost one local man his home in a fire, but you know what?  At least the terrorists didn't get his stuff.

Lose your house, lose your vote

The chairman of the Republican Party in Macomb County Michigan, a key swing county in a key swing state, is planning to use a list of foreclosed homes to block people from voting in the upcoming election as part of the state GOP’s effort to challenge some voters on Election Day.

Sure, it stops fakers from voting from foreclosed addresses.  But what about people who still live there?  What about people who don't have a new address?  What about people fighting and contesting the foreclosure?  Don't worry, this would stop them from voting too.  Remember, when poor people vote rich people suffer.

 

Senate Committee Expands Justice Department Copyright Enforcement Powers

Sweeping legislation granting the U.S. Justice Department the ability to prosecute civil cases of copyright infringement sailed through the Senate Judiciary Committee 14-4 on Thursday, and is expected to hit the Senate floor for a vote soon.
[...]
The Enforcement of Intellectual Property Rights Act, (.pdf) as we reported Tuesday, also creates a Cabinet-level copyright-patent czar charged with creating a worldwide plan to combat piracy. The czar would "report directly to the president and Congress regarding domestic and international intellectual property enforcement programs."

Finally, people are stepping up to change unreasonable search and seizure, along with due process, into the new standard.  I'm sick of all these "rights" and whatnot.  It takes to long to get people prosecuted!

Quebec man changes name to dodge relentless airport screening

While he loses patriot points for both complaining about security and for being Canadian he does get ingenuity points.  He got around the terrorist watch list by changing his name from Mario Labbé to François Mario Labbé.  Really.  It's not like a terrorist would ever think of chaning their name.  The system is safe for another day.

Cops Need Warrant for Cellphone Location Data, Judge Rules
And this man is a terrorist.  He pushed until a judge ruled that the police do indeed need a warrant to tap your cell phone and track your movement.  But don't worry.  The ruling only applies to Pennsylvania so the rest of the country is still fare game.  Freedom is knowing that people with guns always know where you are.  Always.